Monday 24 September 2012

Birthday bonanzas

Raghav's various birthday parties have certainly left an indelible mark on him. Yesterday he was in a terribly good mood, and despite the fact that we didn't do much all day he was jumping and skipping and dancing at home all evening. While I was cooking and Nalin was working, Raghav busied himself with this and that and would only come to me to show me something clever that he had done.

He put a chopstick in his football (in that indentation where the air is filled) and sat and sang "Happy Birthday" to himself. As soon as I saw him do that I remembered that he had a football shaped cake on his birthday, and that we had put candles on it and sang Happy Birthday to him.

Another invention of the chopstick was when I gave him a piece of apple to eat, he put his chopstick through it and ate it like that ! I don't think he's ever seen anyone eat fruit like that.

The Boy and the Whistle
On the birthday that was celebrated in his class, Nalin and Nitin had carried some whistles for the kids. Throughout the party, Raghav was stuck with obsessively trying to blow that whistle. There was another kid who was able to do it, and Raghav seemed obsessed with trying to do it as well. He was able to unfurl it by blowing into it, but he couldn't get it to produce any noise. Even while the birthday song is being sung, all he's doing is blowing the whistle. Even when it was time to blow the candles, he's trying to blow the candles while the whistle is still in his mouth. The video then shows either Nalin or Nitin taking out the whistle from his mouth, and when he's finished with blowing out the candles and clapping for his birthday song, he goes right back to demanding the whistle back.

Wednesday 19 September 2012

Jabber jabber

Raghav has started talking a lot since we got back from India. Not only does he repeat what we say to him, he also repeats what we say to each other. Some of the things he has repeated off us were... “Don’t worry, dadi !”, “Forget it”, “Bangalore.. theek nahi” and then “Bangalore achcha hai”. Not only does he just repeat things, he’s often actually understanding them. It’s possible now to explain things to him and give him a reason why, for instance, we cannot go to the pool today, or that his dinosaur t-shirt is dirty and that he cannot wear it today.

He has also become far more opinionated. For the past two days he has become more interested in the clothes he wears and always asks for clothes he recognises – his dinosaur t-shirt, dog t-shirt, B shorts, boat t-shirt, “wheel bus” t-shirt. He doesn’t like simple clothes with just stripes etc. Even when you’re trying to put him to bed, he will demand a certain t-shirt that he has just remembered. But sometimes when he’s making a demand in the morning for a certain t-shirt, you can explain to him that he needs to wear his uniform and he will not argue.

He has also become loud and opinionated in what he wants us to do. When he’s trying to sleep, he will order us “Daddy, lie down !”, pointing to the single bed in his room. After coming back from India, he had got used to sleeping with us in our bed, but now he has to sleep in his cot. In Singapore, for the first few weeks, he wanted to either sleep on the bed in his room alongwith Nalin, or he wanted either Nalin or me to sleep on the bed, while he slept in his cot. But now, he gets upset when we leave him in his cot and come out and he starts crying, but I can now explain to him that mamma’s cooking or that daddy is having his dinner, or that mamma-daddy are going to sleep in their own room, and that Raghav everyday sleeps in his bed, he seems to get it and lies down quietly.

He also went through a major Daddy phase, where he wanted daddy to do everything for him. He wasn’t well for a little while, and he wanted only daddy to pat him or pick him up or change him etc etc.

Such fun jumping with didi !
The cutest thing he does now is when he sings his nursery rhymes. He can sing full sentences now, even though he doesn’t talk full sentences as a habit yet. He can sing the whole Twinkle Twinkle, if only repeating “like a diamond in the sky” twice instead of singing ‘up above the world so high”. But when you sing with him, he seems to know all the words and tries to sing the whole song. He knows “Baba black sheep” and the ABC song. Every other day he also tells me to sing a song that I haven’t actually taught him, and that I know he has picked up from school, like “Ringa ringa”, or “This is way we brush our teeth”, or “Row row” which I used to sing for him very long back, but he certainly can’t remember it from them. His current favourite is “Wheels on the Bus”. He has watched it enough times on the computer at dadaji’s place, and then on the iPad a few times. He also has it on his song CD at home. He tells you which line he wants you to sing. He says “swish swish” for the line “wipers on the bus”, or “wah wah” for “baby on the bus” and so on.

He has become more agile in the playground, climbing quite a bit of the monkey ladder and hanging from bars here and there. He also loves to sit on the wheel there or make me sit on it, while he sits behind me, saying “mamma drive”. And then he makes me sing “wheels on the bus”. Going to the playground is an everyday feature now after school, and he gets very upset if you don’t let him go. The only way you can drive him away from it is if you say the other magic words “biscuit” “cake” “Robinji” or “pool”.

Loves his umbrella. Carries it everywhere !
We have bought him a “boy doll” from Ikea. He liked the little black boy with curly hair and we now call him Baby Raka. He seems to quite enjoy it. He shares his toys with it, indulges me when I feed it apples and then tries to do the same, he makes it “sit” (propped against the sofa) while he plays with his train – like they’re really playing together. I can even get him to brush his teeth if I pretend to brush Baby Raka’s teethe first. He also puts Baby Raka on the pot and then asks me get the wipes to wipe its bum. He asked me to put the reducer the other day on the big pot and then make Baby Raka sit on that. Thanks to all this, he has started sitting on the big pot before he goes to sleep. He doesn’t do anything yet, but it’s still a start. But we were shocked that he knows exactly what needs to be done when one does pee-pee and poo-poo (sit on the pot, wipe with the toilet paper, flush) but he won’t do it himself. In fact, I always thought that he thinks sitting on the big pot is only for adults, but the other day he got Baby Raka to sit on the big pot as well, so he does know it’s something he should be doing also (but is probably too busy to do just yet). He was getting Baby Raka to do exercises with daddy this morning, “baby shoulders !” when daddy did stretching exercised for his shoulders, and “baby push-up !” when daddy did push-ups.

At school, his teacher tells us that he’s a very enthusiastic, happy child, always willing to participate in class. Even in the Chinese lessons he’s eager to learn, even though he doesn’t know any Chinese at all, while the other kids in class speak it. He might not eat his food happily, but drinks his milk like a fish. He also loves the afternoon snack, maybe because it’s usually cake.
Was too scared to feed the elephant
himself, but squealed in delight
every time daddy did.

There was a complaint about him from school the other day. A little girl (we later came to know it was a boy), called Eee-e (or something), came whining and clutching her ear which was red. Raghav was in her vicinity, so the teacher assumed that Raghav was involving in some sort of pinching or pulling. She asked Raghav to say sorry, and he didn’t, and when she insisted he started crying. But he came and told us about it later when we asked him, and kept saying “Eee-e sorry”. And now the teacher says that every time someone does something wrong in class, Raghav jumps in and starts saying sorry !

He has started telling me a lot more about school now. He tells me the names of his friends, and that he “shared” with them – I think it’s also something they learn at school, because while earlier sharing only meant that when he wanted something he would shout “share share”, and when I would ask him to share something with someone else he’d say “no !”, whereas now he willingly shares his toys with other kids and even tries to involve Baby Raka in his games; of course only to change his mind seconds later and want his toys back. Usually, his conversation about school is about “milk finish” and about who fell and got hurt where (“Ankita gir, Ankita chot knees”).

He's convinced the monkeys were eating mishri,
because of the way they were eating their nuts from the
palms of their hands.
He met his friend from class yesterday just as we were leaving the pool, and they both stopped and started laughing at seeing each other. Raghav kept pointing to him and telling me his name “daiche” (Dongje?) or something, and the other kid kept laughing at having met Raghav, like “hey, what’re you doing here!”.

At school they do a lot of activities like making bubbles, cutting out various shapes, identifying body parts... and he comes and tries to tell me over the week what they did. I only understand a bit of what he says when I look at his school worksheet and what they’ve been doing the past week.

He is great at remembering things. Shreya’s mum Manjeri had left for us a bag of Shreya’s toys before they left for New York, and as soon as he saw Shreya’s ball, Raghav said “Shreya ball”, even though he had only played with it once in her house, over a month ago.

Every time he sees daddy wear a belt, he says “formal belt” because when we were going to Jaipur, Nalin had asked Nitin to buy him a formal belt from CP, and Papa and Nitin had taken Raghav to buy the formal belt for daddy. So he tells you the whole story, “formal belt, chacha, dadaji drive”.

Also, every time I put powder on his back, he says “nani powder” because he saw the same powder bottle at Nani’s place in Fatehpur, and even though I have never told him that nani gave this powder for Raghav.

He had a fun time at the zoo when we went recently, and still remembers things from there, like when he fed banana to the elephant, and carrots to the giraffe, and that the rhino (he says the full word "rhino ceros", like that, with a space in between) was sleeping, and that the leopard was having a bath (there was a little stream in his cage), and that he sat in the pram and we went to Robinji. We bought him an umbrella there, which he has badly wanted ever since he saw one at Nihal's place in Delhi. He now takes it everywhere with him -- to school and even tries to take it to the mall -- and his small orange backpack that was a birthday gift.

Tuesday 18 September 2012

Raghav is Two

Blowing the candles with didi
Little Raghav turned Two a few days ago. He has already celebrated his birthday twice, with two massive birthday cakes, and will be celebrating it a third time today at playschool.

We were in India with family and friends during the time, and Raghav was too busy and excited all month to eat anything or sleep on time.

In Fatehpur, he first tried to grow familiar with his Nana, much to Nani's disappointment. First, he was very impressed with Nana's scooter and wanted to ride it all the time, then whenever Nana came home from the clinic he followed him round the house while Nana took off his shoes and changed his clothes etc. and told him all that he had done during the day.
His no. 2 cake. It also had a bee on it.

His monosyllabic dialogue mostly comprised "chot" and "gir"... when and how Raghav fell and how he was hurt, and his potty concerns, among others. (For some reason he is obsessed with the two phenomenon; his first full sentence also was "I fall down" at the emergency room while we were waiting one Sunday afternoon for someone to come and dress the slight injury which he had sustained quite innocently at a mall earlier.) He's also very repetitive, carrying on with the same thing again and again, perhaps not sure yet whether people understand him clearly or not. But even though he doesn't speak full sentences yet, there's never a moment when we don't understand what he wants. Since we've come back from the India trip, he's been going on chanting "i-pad i-pad", which I'm conveniently hearing as "apple". (Robin and Leslie have given him a baby i-pad for his birthday, but after observing it for a good two minutes and trying to move the icons like he knows how to do on a real i-pad, he realised it was "for babies" and he abandoned it and has not returned to it since.)

The famous cow that came to eat "patatha"
His Nani thinks he has a fantastic memory and it's remarkable how he can connect things. Even now when we speak to Nani on the phone, he remembers all the things they did in Fatehpur -- "Nani teeka", "Nani pooja", "mishi" (Nani used to give him mishri), "Nana office", "Nana scooter" and then of course the cow coming for a snack incident. It has perhaps left such a lasting impression on his mind that very often he remembers it and says "cow patatha", "cow brkfast" and "cow blessyou" (when the cow had sneezed in his face and I had encouraged him to say "bless you!").

Throughout the vacation he also asked about his school friends -- Fefe?, Shreya?, Teacher? and sometimes even Kaku (Shreya's dad)-- and only when I assured him that everyone was asleep and had sent messages for Raghav to sleep, too, was he satisfied. After the Fatehpur trip, while in Delhi, he asked about his friends in Fatehpur -- Madhu? Mohii? (Mohini) and Changu, and sometimes Sanoni (Saloni). When he first saw Changu with his two ponytails he thought it was Fefe and started calling him Fefe and going and hugging him etc. Changu never played with him, but continued to be Raghav's favourite, and when I told him "he never plays with you, still you keep going Changu Changu", he started calling him Changu Changu, thinking that was his name.

Delhi was so insanely exciting for him that he actually had no time to sleep or eat, and so he only ate what he just could not refuse (cake, apple, juice, biscuit) and slept only when everyone else had fallen asleep, creating a very upset Mamma. I once smacked him on his head when he had just refused to sleep after some four vain attempts from me, and he went out to the living room where everyone was sitting and said "mamma chot" and did the being smacked-on-the-head action for everyone to understand, much to my embarrassment.

A make-up kiss after an afternoon of fighting.
He knows all about birthdays, even before he had his. I was lighting the gas one day, and it lit only half when I stepped in to blow on it and light it all the way; and he saw me and said "Happy Birthday", and then when I asked him more, he finally told me about what appeared to have been Fefe's birthday and that the teacher sang "Happy Birthday To You, Dear Fefe", and Fefe blew on the candles ("very hot") and everyone clapped and the cake was cut. On his own birthday he was very excited to see his "2" shaped cake, and knew that you had blow the candles and cut the cake and clap and then sing Happy Birthday. He also excitedly pointed to the bees on his cake. At the second party, after I'd taken the cake away (because he and Tanvi were busy licking the frosting) I gave them one piece to share before lunch, and he was busy planting plastic spoons on it the way that I had planted the candles on it earlier.

There was even a fight at the second party when Raghav and Sanjeev's daughter Shyambhavi went tug-of-war over the same car. Hair were pulled, tears streamed down and mothers were called for solace, and even when Shyambhavi had moved on to crayons, Raghav kept coming back to snatch a crayon from her, not because he wanted it, but because he did not want her to play with it. Once he even came and gave her a couple of colour pencils before snatching the crayon from her, as if he could have her play with anything except those very crayons (the ones he actually never played with)!

Opening the presents.
When I gave all the kids their return gifts, Raghav asked for one for himself, too, and when finally given one of the presents he had received that day, he sat on the floor and proceeded to unwrap it for several intensely attentive minutes. He was asleep within seconds in the car when we left the party.

He had the best time with Tanvi and Nihal at the party, and all toys that we had put together for the kids to be busy with, were a waste for the three. They held hands and jumped, climbed onto Nihal and made him into a horse, climbed on the sofas and generally did a lot of horsing-around.

He has started becoming extremely attached to people, and I always dread that he's going to throw a fit when he's leaving his Dadaji behind, or when Chacha goes away, but he always manages to get distracted and it's not necessarily a mess. Although for the past couple of days he has been only demanding Daddy. He had fever two nights ago, would not be quiet in my arms, kept saying "daddy paas" or "daddy godi" and then was immediately calmed when daddy picked him up and then proceeded to sleep on daddy's chest all night.

At other times, he's too busy too to even spare a kiss, and you have to work it into a routine -- for instance, when you say goodnight or when I make him wear his shoes and demand a kiss, he seems ok with it.
He smiled through his haircut with chacha and dadaji.
And when you ask him where is hair went, he says
"monkey head" - monkey took his hair - I taught him.

I left him for the first time for all day and all night when Nalin and I went to Jaipur for the day. He managed pretty well, although without eating much and skipping his afternoon nap, and then Nitin called in the evening to say he was just ready to cry and was saying "mamma paas", but when I called back and wanted to speak to him, he'd been distracted by then and was demanding for the TV to be switched on. He had a bad night when we reached back, though, with severe constipation that he'd been trying unsuccessfully to clear for 2-3 days. He slept on my chest all night, and whined as soon as I tried to move him onto the bed; but was brilliantly bright and cheerful when he woke up the next morning.


Nursery rhymes at school
His teacher keeps putting up their pictures from school, and it's so interesting to see the various things they do. He's currenly obsessed with bicycles and cars, but of course his first love remains balls. But he has recently developed a soft and caring side, too, perhaps from something he's seen at school. He hugs and kisses the little sherrif hand puppet he has and even sometimes takes him to sleep with him in his cot while patting and caressing it (he mostly hates to be patted or caressed to sleep, though, because he's always trying to fight us putting him to sleep; but from weeks of co-sleeping in India, towards the end of our trip he had starting almost snuggling into me till he was finally ready to sleep, which is when he would go and find the most comfortable spot on the bed for himself -- mostly one that let him dangle a leg, hand or head from the edge of the bed). Leslie has given him Poo Bear, which he again sometimes hugs and kisses and even took to Vivo City with him yesterday, even though he refused to hold it once we got there. But seeing his school pictures I feel I miss out on so much that goes on in his life.